This is Peanut Butter Brickle. Today, I get my stitches out. Finally. After ten days, I get to not be held together anymore. I get to heal on my own. I will be roaring like a tiger.
You may have heard the good news yesterday. My test results came back. And I don’t have a cancer monster. I’m more than glad about that.
Life lately has seemed a lot like stitches. Most of us are barely holding it together. Most of us don’t remember the last time we felt good.
Most of us are nervous and apprehensive about what’s next. The news is bad all of the time. It’s hard to hold it together for everyone else and help everyone else when you aren’t doing so good yourself. That’s how I’ve felt.
I miss Digby. But I have to be strong to show Fruitycake what a great life he has.
I want to hike longer and keep up with Fruitycake but my years are many. And I just can’t do what I used to. Some days I get sad about it. Other days I’m glad for what I can do. Some days I hold it together. And some days I don’t.
If you feel like you are struggling too, it’s ok. Our world is supposed to be getting back to normal after that Covid monster. But we don’t feel normal. We feel nervous and scared. We may not be used to being around a lot of people. We may not even know how to feel.
Just like my stitches have been holding me together, so had my will to get better. But I have to get those out today. Will I still be able to hold it together? I’m going to try.
Whatever gives you strength and helps you to hold it together, do that.
Whether that means taking a break. Or checking out to be alone for a little while, do that. Some days you will feel strong. Some days you won’t. Be good to yourself and give yourself time. There may be that day like I had yesterday when I woke up and got that good news that the cancer monster wasn’t there. Now my will to live my best life is back. And it will be the future that holds me together.
–Peanut Butter Brickle