New Mexico. Is. Arrested.

This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle. Well, this might be the fastest arrest of a state so far on this trip.  But when you get run over, is that not enough to warrant an arrest?  You cannot argue with that.

There I was yesterday.  Minding my own business and being a Sheriff.  I had already hiked about three miles with Deputy Digby Pancake and Girl Person.  So now, it was my afternoon off which entails a snack inside, a quick nap, and then I go outside with Girl Person while she washes dishes in the dirt and I supervise while having another snack.  Then, after about ten minutes of supervising, I need a second shift, so the Deputy comes out to also take a nap and pretend to watch the campground.  It was then, at this time in our work day, that I decided to take a little siesta. You know, a siesta. And then. This. Happened.

 

I can’t make this stuff up.  I knew about the Roadrunner.  And I knew of his speed.  I also knew of his feud with the Coyote.  However.  I assumed that this would stay back in the Texas place we just left.  So my guard was down.  Oh, never again Roadrunner. As Girl Person was washing her forks and spoons in the dirt, she saw it run right over me.  Well, I jumped up, not knowing what in the world had just happened.  I mean, who runs over a Sheriff on his lunch break?  This guy.

 

No, it’s not everyday you get run over by a Roadrunner.  It is probably not everyday that the Roadrunner comes across a Sheriff, a Deputy and a Girl Person in the middle of the desert taking siestas and washing coffee pots outside.

But New Mexico? If this is how you operate, by letting your criminals run free and letting them run over visiting law enforcement, I have no choice.  No choice.  No warnings. No probation.  We may have over a week left here still, but news flash.  You. Are. Arrested.  There are many more sunsets to see here and many more days for you to be under arrest.

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I hear your pleas New Mexico.  Your Roadrunner was here first, along with all the Jacks around here who are disguised as Jackrabbits and are messing with the jacks on our Big Blue Treat Wagon RV.  But that is no excuse to let them continue their crime spree.  And as Sheriff, my jurisdiction runs far and wide.  It also does not like to be run over.

Now.  What I will do is allow you to raise some bail for the next week, namely peanut butter cookies, and that way we can enjoy your hiking, your deserts, your food and your beauty.

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But I tell you what.  I will rethink this if I get run over again and or if Jack and the Roadrunner collaborate on another ambush.  If the Roadrunner was in fact looking for the Coyote, he probably should not have been looking for him in the Chihuahuan Desert where we are.  Dogs rule here Roadrunner, and you didn’t even help Girl Person dry the dishes.

Well, today, we really aren’t sure what is going on with our schedule.  The persons are going to see if there is a vacant camping spot here in Carlsbad, but if not, we will be on the road again, inching our way towards Santa Fe.  We still have at least 7 more hours to get there in this Big Blue Treat Wagon and that is a long way to go.  And there is no room for Roadrunners in here. Or Jacks.

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-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle

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You Don’t Know Jack…Jack!

This is Deputy Digby Pancake.  Well now.  If your name is Jack, I implore you to listen up.  If your name isn’t Jack, I also ask you to listen. Because someone around here needs to take some responsibility for their actions and help us out.  We are in the middle of the desert for pancakes sake!

Welcome to New Mexico. #2travelingdogs #campingwithdogs #newmexico #carlsbad

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Our day started off windy.  And when I say windy, I mean wind so hard that it blows your butt to New Mexico by itself.  I guess that is why the roadrunners there are so fast.

Did you ever have one of those days when everything seemed to go not as planned?  Well, that seems to be everyday for us in fact.  But you kinda get used to it when you are on the road.  The unexpected is expected.  So much so, that we don’t know what to expect.

The persons started off their day Wednesday at the state park there in Texas.  They had not been able to swim yet with the weather, but decided that since they would probably never be there again, they must do it.  The wind was only about 40 mph at this point, and pretty cold.  But Girl Person said that she would never forgive herself if she didn’t swim.  Twenty five foot deep water?  Fish nipping at her toes?  Nah…she could handle it.  She put on her bathing suit which is so big on her at this point that it falls off, but who would see her?  No one else was crazy enough to be out there.  Oh.  Except Boy Person who cannot swim.  You heard me.  He cannot swim.  But since he had a snorkel and flippers, he figured it would make him look like he could swim in 25 foot deep water to no one that was there.  But when he saw Girl Person jump in and tell him that she was going to have a heart attack because she was so cold, he promptly decided that it was just too dangerous to swim.  Yeah.  Ok.  I am a dog, and even I know an excuse when I hear one.

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After they got their person antics out of the way, it was time to hit the road to the New Mexico place.  But alas, the Big Blue Treat Wagon let them know that they didn’t know jack.  Apparently, there is a Jack in this RV that doesn’t want to work and earn his keep.  Girl Person tried to explain to me that there are jacks underneath the RV that come up and down to make it level so that we can balance up in here.  I have no idea about that, but whoever Jack is was not working.  Not at all.  So out the door we went again to lay in the sunshiney while the persons tried to talk Jack into working.  I was kinda liking Jack at this point so that I could go outside again.

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If you don’t know Boy Person very well, you may be unaware that he can fix just about anything except when Girl Person is mad at him.  He figured out that a computer thing that talked Jack into going up and down was broke.  So he got out his tweezers and started putting wires together.  And it took a very. Long. Time.  So long that Sheriff Brickle forgot who to arrest.  Well, after about an hour, we were on the road.  Again.  And Jack apparently was real mad about it.  You don’t know JACK, Jack!

We were then on our way to the New Mexico place with a Jack mad about working.  We knew he probably would also decide that once we got to New Mexico he would not punch in a time clock there either.  And by the time we got to camp, about four hours later, you guessed it.  He decided that he had already worked enough overtime.  And he started his antics again.  He was not coming down. And that’s when I figured out who he really was.  I saw him in the desert.  I saw him.  The cause of all of our problems.  Mr. Jack.  Rabbit.  Jackrabbit.

You would think that a rabbit who could go as fast as 45 mph would not mind working a little to make this RV level.  You would think that a rabbit named Jack would understand that instead of hopping up to 19 feet in the air that it would be easier just to put the RV on a level ground.  But no, he had other plans.  To hop away in the desert. And there was no way to catch him with a belly full of pancakes.

So again.  We sat there and waiting on our Boy Person who can’t swim, but who can wire things back together and talk Jack into working one more day.  We got settled hours later as I watched Jack frolic in the desert, laughing at us for making our dinners late.  And I decided right then and there that anyone named Jack was on my arrest list for the week.  There is no way for me to know with all of those Jacks hopping around in the desert who is responsible for our mishaps.  So.  Whether your name is Jack or not Jack, you are all on Sheriff Brickle’s list and you guessed it.  Mine too.  New Mexico place?  You have a jumpin Jack Flash.  And it’s not alright.  Gas?  There is alot of gas in here.  Sorry about that.

This may be an interesting week here in this New Mexico place.  But we wouldn’t have it any other way. We are trying to make our way to Santa Fe…and it is still a far drive.  So stick with us.  We may have to hop there.

-Deputy Digby Pancake

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Like A Tall Drink Of Water

This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle.  Here we are. In the desert.  Somewhere in Texas.

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And we found an oasis of sorts.  No, not the springs here in Balmorhea.

But me.  Me.  I am an oasis.  And Texas?  You. Are. Welcome. You ordered a tall drink of water.  And I am exactly what you ordered.

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When you are in the middle of the desert, and you see all the beautiful things there, you also see how hot it can be in Texas.  We thought we knew hot.  Oh, we did not know it very well.  You look around and wonder how all of the wildlife can survive and how harsh it can be on them.  But then you realize that they were meant to live here and they love it.  Doesn’t mean they don’t get thirsty though. And that is why I am here.  A sight for sore eyes?  It is part of what I do.

Now. You may not think of me as tall when you first look at me.  But let me tell ya.  I am as tall as I am long and I do not accentuate both at the same time.  Because you would pass out from the oasis that I am providing you and that would not serve a purpose.  Like a tall drink of water, I am what ya need.  And Texas?  You. Are. Welcome.

When I saunter by the campers here in Texas, I hear “look at that tall drink of water”. And I am happy that I could do a good job here in Texas of looking good.  But like any tall drink of water, it eventually runs dry.  And we have been here in this Texas place so long, that the people in New Mexico are getting thirsty too.  And so on we must go today.  Another road trip thru the desert is calling our name.

So are you going to come along?  We will get to our first New Mexico location today if all goes well.  And then we will be there until Friday when we head to the Santa Fe area.  Next week will be our rescue visit, and I hear they are thirsty too.  They need to put in their order now though.  There is only so much water to go around. Wait. Who am I fooling?  I am enough handsome for everyone.

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-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle

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Beep Beep!

This is Deputy Digby Pancake. Well, I hate to break it to you. But we are still in this Texas place. You heard me. This Texas place is bigger than Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle’s attitude. And that is big. But it is not bigger than the stack of pancakes I could eat right now.  Nothing is that big.

Yesterday, we had a few hiccups before we got on the road. The Big Blue Treat Wagon is apparently getting a bit tired of moving the last week. And so it refused to. Boy Person also refused to give up and talked it into cooperating. At least for now. So although we were a bit late, we were able to start on our way. Until we we got stopped by a traffic jam in this Texas place.  The traffic jam didn’t know we were late.  And it didn’t care.  Either did the Texas roadrunner that ran past us.  You heard me.  The roadrunner. Beep beep!

Now.  I have seen a lot of things in my day and in my years in fact.  But I have never, and I repeat, I have never seen a bird run past a line of cars on two legs.  Girl Person said that it could fly, but it chose to run which I find ridiculous.  If I could fly to a stack of pancakes instead of running, that would seem like the logical decision.  But Girl Person says that it was not running to a stack of pancakes, but to catch bugs to eat.  To each his own I suppose.  Just leaves more pancakes for me.  Beep Beep!

Now.  I think we can all learn a lesson from the roadrunner. First.  To say Beep Beep all day is fun.  And unless you are getting chased by a hungry coyote like me, it would be fab to be a roadrunner.

You could run past traffic all day and everything that you didn’t like, you could say Beep Beep and go right by it!  What would I choose to Beep Beep to if I was a roadrunner?  I would definitely say Beep Beep to getting arrested all the time by the Sheriff.  I would also say Beep Beep to being woke up from my naps of pancake dreams at odd hours of the day to eat dinner when I would just like to sleep while eating and eat while sleeping.  Is that too much to ask?

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I would also say Beep Beep to the the animals in the shelters and rescues we have visited.  I would Beep Beep them all into forever homes faster than even the roadrunner.  What would YOU Beep Beep in your day?  I would like to know.  Because there are so many roadrunners here and if they can Beep Beep all day, then you can too!

You think people may look at you weird if you Beep Beep all day today past things you don’t like?  Well, they are probably looking at you weird anyway and that is the least of your problems.  Beep Beep past the line at the grocery store with the person that has 11 items instead of 10.  Beep Beep past the doctor who keeps you waiting for like 2 hours in that room when you have things to do like Beep Beep at more things.  Beep Beep past the IHop when there is a wait for a table.  No, actually, don’t Beep Beep past the IHop.  I am rethinking that.  You can wait a little.

So today Texas, we are going to Beep Beep past our tiredness, our Big Blue Treat Wagon problems and our travel weary selves.  We are going to kick back and relax at the desert springs of Balmorhea State Park today because tomorrow we are back on the road yet again.

 

I think though that a roadrunner may get us to New Mexico faster.

New Mexico place?  You need to Beep Beep your way closer to us.  This is getting ridiculous.

-Deputy Digby Pancake

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All My Exes Don’t Live In Texas

This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle.  It is a long way to the New Mexico place.  A really long way.  Why?  This Texas place is ridiculously big.  Bigger than my attitude and that’s big. But not bigger than my handsome.  You already knew that despite the tail that always seems to try and hide my face. Seriously.

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Now.  We know that this Texas place is hot.  We know it has a cactus or million that bite your butt.  We also know that it has wine and rivers and streams and bluebonnet flowers that should grow butter as per Deputy Digby Pancake’s suggestion.  It has some things I am not too fond of, but things I love.  But alas, I am going to have to leave them in Texas.

So although Texas is a place I would dearly love to be, I have to leave. When I woke up this morning and looked out the window of the Big Blue Treat Wagon RV, I was sad that we were getting closer to crossing the state line.  I thought about all the other states we have left behind and how many states I have looked out this same window at.

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Did I appreciate all those states and even all of the things that weren’t my favorite?  What do I remember about each one? The good or the bad? It is kinda like that with exes.  And well, all the states we have visited are now my exes.  I changed my number though, so don’t try and call. That means you New York. That means you Georgia.  And all the rest.

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It seems that we don’t know what we’ve got till its gone.  That is a true story. It’s almost like when you see my corn dog tail and I walk away and you realize you may never see another one.  And you won’t.

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I want you to think about something.  Because that is my job.  Look out YOUR window today.  What if this moment…right now…was the last time that you would see this view? What if this was the last time you would hear that bird or see that tree or see your house?  Would you remember the bad times or the good?

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Our schedule since last May has been full of many goodbyes.  And every week when we wake up in a new place, it is exciting. But the goodbyes are hard. And we want all our exes to know…all the states and the rescues so far on this trip…39 to be exact, that we remember you. All my exes don’t live in Texas for sure.

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Everyone look out your window today and tell us what you see.  What would you miss?  What would you remember?  And try not to think of my corn dog tail.  I know it distracted you.  Kinda like exes.  They try to get ya back.  But sorry Texas, we have to go.  New Mexico is calling.  It has my new number.

We hit the road today for another 300 miles in another Texas camp. Then we should be in New Mexico by Wednesday!  We can do this!! Are you ready to come with us?

-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle

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Get Out Your Map. Fly When You Can.

This is Deputy Digby Pancake. We are enjoying our last few days in this Texas place. We leave this part tomorrow and start heading to somewhere called New Mexico. Where is old Mexico? Since everyone always thinks I am an old dog, maybe we should head there instead. Seriously though.  The next person that calls me old, I am going to make sure I pee on their foot. Then pretend I am so old I forgot I am not supposed to do that. IMG_5836.jpg

Girl Person broke the news that it is over 700 miles to where we are going next. It seems like a long way to go, and it is the furthest distance so far on this trip. But we aren’t going to think about the long travel days ahead. Why? We are very fortunate to be able to do this,  and won’t be able to forever. We learned this from a Texas dragonfly.

Yesterday, as we were picking up all of our camping stuff outside to prepare for the storm coming in, Boy Person found a dragonfly on the ground.  He looked at it very closely and realized that its wings were tore off, but it was still alive.  Now, if you know Boy Person, he has a soft spot for just about all creatures.  Don’t mess with the “bug cup” he keeps in the RV to get out bugs alive.  So when he saw this dragonfly, he picked it up, and the hurt dragonfly clung onto his finger and just wouldn’t let go.

This Texas dragonfly was at the end of his life.  And as Boy Person tried to research all he could on how to help him, he didn’t make it.  Even after the persons tried to feed him dead bugs with tweezers.  Even after they searched high and low for dead bugs, because you can’t kill one bug to keep another bug alive.  Why would you question that? Even after all this, he didn’t make it.  And I had to wonder.  Yes, I wonder sometimes. Did this Texas dragonfly fly everywhere he wanted to?  Did he live his life to the full? Have I? Have you?

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One thing we have plenty of on this trip are maps.  Maps for campgrounds.  Maps for states. Maps for trails.  But there is no map for life.  Everyone of us has our own path and our own way to get to our happiness.  But if we waste time trying to make short cuts to places we know that we don’t want to go, we may get damaged.  But we don’t want to get damaged beyond repair like our Texas dragonfly friend. Because then it is too late.

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Your map may not be one that has you to travel.  Your map may lead right to your comfy home.  But wherever it is that you want to go to reach your happy, do it.  Fly when you can, because tomorrow you may not be able to.

This Texas place has had a surprise for us around every corner.  From its wine to its rivers and streams this week, it has been a little peace of rest.

Texas has a surprise around every corner. #2travelingdogs #texas

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We have needed this rest and sunshiney.

Good for the soul. #texas #hikingwithdogs #2travelingdogs

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But our map is taking us to finish this Adventure Of A Lifetime.  We have nine more states and nine more rescues to go.  Will it be easy?  No.  Will it be full of mishaps and possibly setbacks?  We hope not, but yeah, probably.  But we are going to fly when we can, get out our map which is leading us to save more lives, and you are coming with us.  Are you ready?  It’s going to be a long drive this week.  But we can do it.

Driving with Digby in #texas. #2travelingdogs #hikingwithdogs #drivingwithdigby

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Needless to say, you need a lot of pancakes for a journey this long. And you also have to pace yourself. So we are going to take it slow. And that means as slow as molasses which is not as good on pancakes in my opinion as maple syrup. Actually, let’s just say that the fact is molasses is not the deal.  If there was ever a pancake expert, I am that.

We will miss our Texas dragonfly friend who taught us to live life while we can.  Fly when you can.  Get out your map.  You probably are the only one who knows how to read it.  Does your map lead to traveling? Does it lead to be with your family?  Does it lead you to IHop?  That all sounds good.  But start on the journey today.  Because it is never too late to fly.

-Deputy Digby Pancake 

Everything. Is. Arrested. You’re Welcome. I’m Done.

This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle. Yes, I know. In Texas, I have the honorary title of Texas Ranger this week, which I gave to myself. But alas, this title has gotten on my nerves and I am taking the title away from myself. It is too. Much. Work.

I received all of your arrest recommendations yesterday. And I did take them all into consideration of what next you wanted arrested here and beyond. Consider everything you wanted arrested…arrested. Everything. Is. Arrested.

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You are welcome, but that about did me in. The last straw that made me crave a peanut butter milkshake since you need a straw for that was that someone told me that my tail needed to be arrested because it wasn’t big enough in this state of Texas. Well you know what then? That fan. IS. ARRESTED. And writing in capital letters is exhausting enough. Don’t mess with Texas? Don’t mess with the Sheriff in Texas. Y’all.

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Truth be told, all of these extra job responsibilities this week were too much. Here we are, taking a few extra days in this Texas place to rest a little. Even the persons are too. Well. They are trying. But they aren’t doing a very good job at it.

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And I decided that since none of us know how to relax, I would arrest the internet which we can hardly use here. As well, I arrested all the work that the persons do every day. I arrested the taxes that Girl Person keeps looking at and I don’t know why she is doing that because it is pretty boring. And I arrested all of you so that you have to relax with us this week…until Saturday. I also arrested one more thing. Our schedule.

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You may know that every week, we are in a different state. Well, we have nine more to go. And the states are getting bigger, the drives are getting longer, and all of us in this family are wearing out. We still have to make it to the Grand Canyon..and well.  This may be us if we don’t take it slower.

It is too much for me, most importantly, to make these long, long drives, work, arrest, go to the shelters and the persons work literally through every Saturday night to make their videos and rescue article…and then we have to go again.

Truth be told, and the Sheriff is about truth, at the beginning of this trip we pushed ourselves. In the middle of this trip, we pushed ourselves. But at the end of this trip? Not gonna do it. Girl Person and Boy Person’s first priority is me and Digby. And that is how it should be. They know we are tired too, and so…for the remaining nine states on this Adventure Of A Lifetime, you may notice our schedule changing a bit. It may take us up to two weeks for each state, but some states may not. The drives are more than twice as long, and we simply need to be healthy and happy and handsome. The last part there isn’t hard to do, but the rest is important as well. Don’t even mention the Big Blue Treat Wagon or the Jeep making it to the end of this trip. We gotta make sure they are ok too.

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Now. This schedule change does not mean the trip is going to go on forever. We are ready to finish to see what is next..which we have no idea what is next after this. We are not worried about that, well, the persons are a little. But worrying seems to interrupt the time we have left on this trip, which we may never get to do again. So although worrying is what I do, that is arrested too. And that will be my last arrest, unless there is an emergency, until Saturday. If you need me, don’t call me.  The boys are on a break.

Texas is too beautiful of a place to take for granted. The falls and the wineries and the scenery in this Texas Hill Country are breathtaking.

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Not as breathtaking as me, but close. If there ever was a place that my corn dog tail shined like a diamond, which we do not have since it was stolen in Arkansas, it was here. I could get used to this. But we have nine more states to go. Nine more rescues to visit. And nine more places to make arrests, far and wide. I may be coming for you if you are the one that talked about my tail. And if you didn’t, and you thought it anyway, one last thing before my break. YOU. ARE. ARRESTED.

-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle

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Talk To The Tail

This is honorary Sheriff Texas Ranger Peanut Butter Brickle. Since I received this honorary title from myself at the beginning of the week, I am not sure how to arrange these distinctions. It is almost as confusing as the confusing pattern of my brindle beauteous. I guess that is good for what I have to do. To confuse people means that they are less likely to try and fool me. And you don’t fool a Texas Ranger. Or a Sheriff. Or a Sheriff Texas Ranger. Or a Texas Ranger Sheriff.

If there was ever a job hazard, I have it.  I have realized this week that in this Texas place, there are many hazards.  Cactus.

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There are snakes hiding near the water.

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There is the blazing sun which makes you want to eat peanut butter brickle ice cream all day in the shade. If you can find shade without a cactus or snake on your butt.

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And then there is job hazard #1.  The Deputy Ranger.  Or Ranger Deputy.  And his dern tail.

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You may think to yourself that I have always had this job hazard. Why am I just now realizing it in this Teas place?  Well.  With all the other hazards here, this hazard is hiding the other hazards which is making my job even more of a hazard.  You would think that we lived in Hazzard County or something.  Is that in Texas? NO?  Makes no sense then.

Anyway.  Every time I turn a corner, that tail hits me in the face. Every time I go anywhere with this guy, his tail is doing some talking right in my gorgeous profile.  Or the back of my head.  Or in my eyes.  All of the above.

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On top of all of that, this tail is interrupting me intercepting communications from criminals like that German Shepherd we met on our walk this morning who was growling under his breath. I think he said that he knew where that Arkansas diamond was that I arrested Arkansas for.  Now we will never know.

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Deputy Digby told me his tail picked up that Texas is twice the size of Germany. Well, interesting fact, tail.  I don’t really need that for my job however.

Staightenin’ the curves
Flattenin’ the hills
Someday the mountain might get ’em
But the law never will

I do know that the Deputy’s tail is twice as long as it should be.  And that is a fact  you can stick in your hat and smoke it.  Why do things I say make no sense sometimes?  I assume it is because Girl Person is interpreting it.  And her translation is a little off.  Like the tail’s timing.

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As Sheriff Texas Ranger or Texas Ranger Sheriff this week, I am arresting Deputy Digby’s tail. Why?

That’s just a little bit more
Than the law will allow

If I don’t put a stop to its meddling with the law here in Texas, it is going to follow me to the New Mexico place next week.  And I don’t need that.  I have too many arrests to make this week as Texas Ranger.  I gave myself a quota.  I am also taking suggestions on what or who to arrest this week. You never know. If your suggestion is a good one, I may write about it tomorrow. By the way, I may be in Texas, but as an honorary Ranger, I gave myself worldwide arrest jurisdiction.  Talk to the tail. Or leave your comments below. Also on our Facebook page.  Or you will be the one arrested.

Just the good ol’ boys
Never meanin’ no harm
Beats all you never saw
Been in trouble with the law
Since the day they was born

-Texas Ranger Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle aka Sheriff Texas Ranger Peanut Butter Brickle

This week, drop by the 4-Legger Facebook page for fun information on why organic shampoo makes a difference for us everyday on our trip! Give them a “like”!

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Bloom Where You Are Planted. In Texas Butter Flowers.

This is Deputy Ranger Digby Pancake. This is the first time I am using my Texas title of Deputy Ranger.

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Well, yesterday was the first day of Spring. They say that things smell better during springtime. You know. Like the flowers and the grass. Springtime here is beautiful in this Texas place. I especially like the bluebonnets. They are like a dream come true to me. There is only one bluebonnet that I know of. And I am so excited that we traveled all this way and just in time. Every thing is better with bluebonnets on it.  That’s what they say.


Bluebonnets make butter. Did you know that? No one has ever told me about this because they know that I would have hopped on the first plane to Texas and eat them all.  But I think that I got here just in time for the flower butter season because they are everywhere. And I know that when they really bloom, really, really bloom, there will be butter everywhere! Everywhere for pancakes! Can you imagine?

If I didn’t know better, and I never know better, I would have suggested that these wildflowers had pancake flowers growing next to them. It only makes sense. Since bees pollinate flowers, they could cross pollinate these and even make honey pancakes to go with the bluebonnet butter. As well, a maple syrup flower would have been appropriate to be planted alongside. Now, as Deputy Ranger Digby Pancake with duties in this Texas place this week, this is my first report. Texas. Please start handing out pancake flower seeds, maple syrup seeds and throw them by the bluebonnet flowers. I don’t want anyone digging up anything, despite what my name implies. These seeds are so special that they will grow sprinkled like magic and when that butter blooms, it will be more than any one Texan can handle. Which is why I will be back to help harvest. One we harvest the butter, we can spread it on everything I tell you! Everything!

You may wonder to yourself. What does Sheriff Texas Ranger Peanut Butter Brickle think of my first action as Deputy Ranger? He is too busy making arrests. Monday, he arrested the state of Arkansas for withholding that diamond. And today, he is arresting the cactus plants that have seemed to take hold on my pancake butt which will be even bigger when the bluebonnets are ready. Seems like nature is trying to keep me out of the butter. No one keeps a Digby Pancake out of butter, I will tell you that.

I sure do love this Texas place. They say the stars at night are big and bright here.

And we can tell you that they really are. When we go outside at night, and look up, the world seems very small. You realize just how little we all are and how many pancakes could be on other planets, or if there was a pancake planet. The Texas stars make you think. They make you appreciate how wonderful our life can be when we stop and look up. Or look down. I am ready bluebonnets. Let’s make some butter! I’m waiting.

-Deputy Digby Pancake

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Oh No, Chuck Norris.

This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle. However. Today, I am going to be adding to my title as Sheriff. You know it. This. Is. Texas Ranger Peanut Butter Brickle.

Now. You may ask yourself. How did a Sheriff become a Texas Ranger? Well, haven’t you ever heard of a honorary title? A honorary Texas Ranger? Just ask some boy person named Chuck Norris.

I heard about this. And ever since we arrived in Texas, I knew that I would also receive a honorary title of Texas Ranger. From myself.

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Cause the rule of law and order starts at the Texas border,
With the Lone Star of the Ranger shining bright.

You may ask yourself. How can a Sheriff give himself a honorary title of Texas Ranger? You don’t need to know the details. But Sheriff Brickle can do that. I also figured that since we are only here until Saturday, that the courts would not have enough time to question this honor that I have given myself. Also, they may thank me for bestowing such an honor on myself after they see just how much I have accomplished and or arrested this week. And I have six days to do it.

The first of my arrests is going to be the state of Arkansas. Arkansas? You heard me.

In the eyes of a ranger,
The unsuspected stranger
Had better know the truth of wrong from right

Yes, I know that we left there a little less than two weeks ago. But sometimes, you get evidence later, and for that Arkansas place, there is no statue of limitations on this one my friends. First of all, you made us dig two days for diamonds at your Crater Of Diamonds State Park. Second of all, someone found a 7 carat diamond when we left. Third, we dug in that same dern stream both days. And last. We found no Jim or gems. We found no carrots of carots. And instead, you decided to let a little boy person find the biggest one ever since 1972 when we left. And do you think that is coincidence? Absolutely not. We dug all that dirt and did all that work, and you are not welcome little boy person. And Arkansas? Oh. You are totally arrested. Do you know how many peanut butter cookies that could have bought?

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So Texas? That is my first arrest. And it is a good one. Arresting another state is probably something that none of your Texas Rangers have ever done. And I highly doubt your Chuck Norris ever did. Did I mention that I was a man when I was a baby? I don’t think Chuck Norris can say that. How was I a man when I am a dog? That is not important and also not in the paperwork when I applied for this honorary title and put my paw of approval on it.

When youre in Texas look behind you,
Cuz that’s where the rangers are gonna be

You may wonder if my Deputy Digby Pancake is also now a honorary Texas Ranger?

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Since he is a Deputy, it was not so apparent that he should be given this title in my opinion. I asked my myself my opinion however. And since I need him as backup, I have given him the honor as well. I asked for a bribe to do this as Sheriff, but as a Texas Ranger, I won’t arrest my old self for this.

There is too much work and or arrests to be done in the six days we have left here. This is our nice picture to throw everyone off.  Would Texas Rangers pose in blue bonnets? No.  We are fooling everyone.

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I have told Girl Person and Boy Person that they need a break this week, which is why we are here in this Texas place until Saturday. Yes, we know it is a few extra days. But this state is big, our bodies are growing a little tired, and um, there is wine in this here part of Texas. So as a honorary Texas Ranger, I am allowing them to take it easier this week. We had our Texas rescue visit last week with the Humane Society of Central Texas and it was a good one.

But this week we will be highlighting the animals from another Texas rescue since we have some extra days here which is ran by the Associate Director of the Humane Society, April. Wow. She has alot of jobs and titles too. Her rescue is called Long Way Home and she has some wonderful adoptable animals. Don’t miss them on our Facebook page this week or you will be added to the list of Texas arrests. Oh, you don’t live in Texas? As a Texas Ranger, I don’t particularly care for details. Don’t mess with Texas. And don’t mess with Sheriff Texas Ranger Peanut Butter Brickle. Or Willie Nelson. I don’t know why.

So fans? Are you ready for a great few days more in this Texas place with your honorary Texas Ranger? I am proof that dreams can come true if you make them come true for yourself. Oh, a Sheriff as a Texas Ranger? I thank myself for this title. I accept this title from myself. And I am ready for action.

-Texas Ranger Peanut Butter Brickle

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