This is Deputy Digby Pancake. If there were ever dogs that had too many jobs, it would be Sheriff Brickle and I. And me. Myself. What is proper grammar, I have no idea, which this sentence is not proper as well, but who is proper? Not me. Not I. Not myself. Would you like me to keep going with this?
So I’d like to know where, you got the notion
Said I’d like to know where, you got the notion
(To rock the boat), don’t rock the boat baby
Since I have so many jobs, I won’t be adding Grammar Police, that is another jurisdiction. You see, yesterday, we had some issues with parking this Big Blue Treat Wagon RV, which is out of treats, but I am not an auditor, so I won’t be writing a report on that. Not my job again. However, as Deputy, I can write a report on how everyone was arrested yesterday. Girl Person, for finding us a campsite here, the only one here, which in retrospect, there was a reason why it was the only one. Boy Person for trying so hard to park this RV, which from here on out will not be called the Big Blue Treat Wagon RV, because we gave all of our treats away to the rescues and shelters. We could use a fill up. And then, Sheriff Brickle for pretending like he didn’t know what was going on so that he could lay in the shade and ignore the whole situation to leave it on me as Deputy.
I will even arrest myself for not understanding what in the world was going on, still trying to catch a varmit in a hole of which I do not know what said varmit is, because I don’t live here. I will arrest myself for being able to go to sleep during the whole commotion. And I will arrest myself for not thinking that it was a big deal. Until. Our boat started rocking.
As you probably could have guessed by now, we were unable to find a camping spot anywhere due to the holiday this week. We wanted to keep heading out of this California place, stopping to see a few more things, but we couldn’t find anywhere to stay. I will interrupt all of those who are going to message us and email us that we should have thought of this long ago, and I will tell you that we can barely get by day by day, we have been doing this over a year and a half now, and we have made every mistake there is to be made on the road. Not being able to keep up with this traveling schedule is something that the persons still have to work on in-between their work, moving every few days, looking for a house, doing laundry, finding food every where we go and…well…should I go on? So yeah, your point is taken. And that’s that.
Our love is like a ship on the ocean
We’ve been sailing with a cargo full of love and devotion
So anyway, the only camping spot that we could find is right where we have been for the last week. They literally had one spot left, and due to hot weather in some parts of the state next week, and holiday traffic, we decided that we should probably just stay where we were, delay traveling for another week and make the best of it. The persons were feeling a bit down about not sticking to the schedule, but sometimes, you can’t change what you can’t change. And if you have to be stuck somewhere, this is a pretty nice place to make due.
Up to now we sailed through every storm
And I’ve always had your tender lips to keep me warm
Oh, I need to have the strength that flows from you
Don’t let me drift away my dear, when love can see me through
(Our love is like a ship on the ocean)
But in order to stay, we had to move campsites down the road. As we packed all of our stuff up once again, we got back in the RV and headed to the new spot. And it looked just like any other spot. But when Boy Person backed up into it, it was not meant to be. This spot was on a slope. A very big slope. And when you are trying to get your house level, it is not so easy to do in a spot like this. In fact, it is pretty much impossible. Mission impossible seemed possible compared to this.
So, as Boy Person kept backing up and pulling forward to try and make it work, it became apparent that it was not going to work. At all. So he pulled out all kinds of blocks to put under the tires.
He pulled out all the stops, but it wasn’t working. Again. He went up to the camp office, told the people that this spot was not working, and they let him know there was no other spot to try and make work, and yeah. There was no money back guarantee.
Now. Some days are a test of patience, a test of anger control, a test to see what you are made of. If you are Sheriff Brickle, sugar, spice and everything nice isn’t in the recipe. But Boy Person’s recipe? He has more patience added in there than Girl Person, and as she got hit with dust, diesel fumes and almost getting ran over a few times by this RV, she was over it. We had been stuck in the Jeep waiting this whole time, watching the RV go back and forth. Up and down. So Girl Person got us out, made us a comfy spot on a rug in the shade and told us to be good as she continued to help Boy Person. But as he backed up over some blocks for the millionth time, I saw it. It started rocking back and forth, the back tires literally came up off the ground completely and Boy Person told us all to run. Now, when someone tells me to run, I don’t ask twice. But Girl Person will be arrested for asking, “why?”. And as Boy Person pushed us all out of the way, that boat went rocking, Boy Person jumped back inside of it and that was that. He told Girl Person it was too late to drive anywhere else. But Girl Person had added too much spice to her recipe that morning, and she told Boy Person we were getting out of here, no matter what it cost.
don’t tip the boat over
(Rock the boat), don’t rock the boat baby
(Rock the boat)
After he calmed himself down, he told her that the only thing he knew to do was go buy some wood and stack it as high as he could to get this RV level. And so off he went to the store, which was by the way, an hour away.
So, Girl Person made herself useful with walking me and the Sheriff, avoiding discarded bones for us to pick up, trying to get away from the crowds of deer, while also trying not to get pulled down a mountain to run into bears or mountain lions. She managed to do all of the following, and therefore considered herself to be having a very successful waiting time. Have you ever had to wait in a doctor’s office, and it seems to take forever, because it is taking forever? That is how Girl Person felt. She was out in the middle of nowhere and all of a sudden realized how alone she felt. She might as well have been on a boat in the middle of the ocean in her opinion, away from the bears.
When you want to see a yellow Jeep pull up, you never do and you might as well be watching for water to boil. A watched pot never boils, Granny said, but eventually it must, right? And so Boy Person pulled up finally with his stacks of wood, and he had even stopped and bought us eggs on the side of the road for our breakfast. We were pretty much happy to see him again.
He looked a little worse for wear after his whole day ordeal, and as he and Girl Person tried to make it so our boat would not tip over, and while he tried not to back up into a pole, Girl Person told me we had to get out of the way in case the RV did fall. Now, I usually don’t worry, but worry was called for in this situation for a couple of reasons. First, you don’t want your house to tip over. Second, your eggs will break if your house tips over, and you won’t get any eggies. And so worry I did, as Sheriff Brickle continued to ignore the situation. And after much drama, running around and shoving wood under the tires, Boy Person said it was going to have to do. And so it did. No eggs were broke, no boat tipped over, and once again, we were set up for the week.
You may be thinking to yourself that this was a long blog. Well, a long blog for a long day. And some days seem longer than others, and that is good in my opinion, because we don’t have enough of them in the first place. Any day, whether your house is about to tip over or not can be a good day, if you can only find the humor in it. You may have to look very hard, and get loads of wood stacked up to reach it, but try. You may laugh about it all in the end.
-Deputy Digby Pancake
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