Forgetting To Remember

This is Deputy Digby Pancake.  Granny Person used to tell me that I would forget my butt if it wasn’t attached.  Well, no one forgets a butt made out of pancakes, or a butt that looks like pancakes.  So I have never forgot it.  But yesterday?  Girl Person said that she forgot to remember.  Not her butt…but Granny Person.  She forgot to remember that it had been four years since they said goodbye.


Now, I miss Granny Person too.  I miss sitting on her couch eating peanuts and watching the news.  I miss hanging out with Cuddles and complaining about everything, because that was fun.  But I don’t miss missing her.

And on days like yesterday, well, I assumed that forgetting to miss her would have been the best thing to do in the situation.

Dogs live in the moment.  And it’s not often that we try to remember the past.  Sure, sure.  We remember persons and we remember Granny Person.

But I am not sure what good it does to make yourself sad on purpose by remembering a goodbye.  I am not sure what good it does to dwell on stuff you would like to forget.  Because when you do that, it crowds out the good memories.  It crowds out the good times.  There isn’t room in the RV for everything.  And there isn’t room in our heads for everything either.  So what do you want to put there?


Girl Person was feeling pretty guilty that it took her half the day to remember that it had been four years since we saw Granny Person.  When she said that, I didn’t think about the last day.  I thought about sneaking peanuts and snacks, and when other family persons would walk in, Granny Person and Girl Person would scramble like eggs to hide their merlot and diet coke.  I thought about how many times I tried to jump up on her country counter full of old grease in mason jars to be saved for a rainy day, when I secretly hoped she would fry me up some pancakes in that.  I thought about how Brickle thought it was his job to protect Granny Person from anyone who came in and how he and Cuddles would have secret conversations about taking over the couch from my pancake butt.  I thought about all of this.  And I forgot about the rest.


You see, forgetting to remember isn’t being disrespectful to who is gone.  It’s saying that you choose to remember what was good when they were here.  It’s about choosing to remember the best.

It doesn’t take much for many of us to feel discouraged.  It doesn’t take much for many of us to get sad.  But if we took all the good memories we choose to remember and forget to remember the bad ones, how much better will we be? The good things about the persons that we miss will stay with us.  And the bad ones will be forgotten.

You know, there are times when I do think about walking thru that orange grove to her house every day at 6 p.m. to get in peanut time before the news started.  There are times when I think about how great it was to spend so much time with her, have sleepovers and yeah, it was great to see Girl Person and her be the best of friends.  But I also remember how many times that she told Girl Person to be happy.  I also remember how many times she told Girl Person that she loved her. And if she were here now, she would say to forget about the sad, go eat some peanuts and be happy.  And that’s what I remember today, yesterday, and every day after that.  The rest, I’m gonna forget about it. Where’s my butt?

-Deputy Digby Pancake

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This is Deputy Digby Pancake.  Seems as though, all of my life, persons have been trying to contain my pancakeness.  With leashes, with harnesses, with fences.

And yet, I have always wondered.  Are persons trying to keep me in, or keep me out?  Are persons trying to keep me safe, or make me crazy?  Do persons really understand all that a fence is for?  And if so, why do so many choose to sit on it?


There are fences at the dog park, fences at the campground, fences in the woods, fences by the river.


And let me just say this.  You may not think that I think a lot.  But stating the obvious doesn’t take much thinking.  Why are there so many fences? What side are you supposed to be on?  And who tells you what side is the right one?


Why do decisions seem to be either the right one or the wrong one?  Maybe a decision is just that.  A decision.  No right one.  No wrong one.  Just different.  Different for different people.  So if you feel like a fence is trying to keep you in, go out.  See what the other side is like.  Try it.  You see, not many decisions in life are permanent.  Many times, we can always choose to go back.  But if you sit on that fence, you definitely aren’t going anywhere.  Unless that’s where you truly want to be. Sometimes, you may get to that fence…like our persons are at now, and you think.  And you wonder.  Should I go through?  It’s ok to have patience with yourself and think things through.

But don’t confuse patience with doing nothing.  Do something.  Go ahead.  Take that fence and see that it is there for a reason. To make you decide where to go.  It’s truly up to you.

-Deputy Digby Pancake

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