This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle. They might say finders keepers. But remember, the Sheriff always has his peepers. I made that up.
Sometimes the unexpected happens. Like when Digby drops a stolen barbecue rib by the trash can because he can’t scarf it down fast enough. That’s very unexpected. His food stealing skills are epic.
Or unexpected like the time Girl Person almost lost her eye bending down to pick up dog yuck.
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Ok. So no one ever told me when I brought a dog…or two…into my life that it would come with hazards. No one ever told me how dangerous it could be to pick up dog poop. In a bag. Tonight I did my dog parent job, bending down to pick up the junk and maybe, just maybe, I should I have looked where I was. Because right as I bent down, there was a water moccasin snake! Screaming, I left it there. I did. I did. I admit it. I admit it. You can judge me if you want, and I guess I deserved what happened next. Because as a car almost hit me on the second go round, I ignored that. I thought well, at least I didn’t run out of bags in this second round. And as I scooped up that junk, a palm tree frond poked me right in my eye! I thought I would be forever blinded…not by the light…but by a hazard no one ever speaks about as a dog parent. Dog. Poop. Duty. Well, I will recover. But maybe I deserved it. #confession #dogparent #sendmoredogpoopbags #lesssnakes #lessfiber
Or maybe unexpected like the time when Girl Person was little and found $20 at a rodeo. Why she was at a rodeo is a question no one has the answer to. But I’ll leave that out of the arrest report today.
When Girl Person was little and she found that money, she was so happy that she told her mom Person. You know. Our Gandma. And Gandma’s advice was to tell the police officer nearby.
When he promptly took the money and told her he would hold on to it just in case someone lost it, well. She never forgot it. Never. And she never saw that $20 again.
Fast forward to now and she can still hear her cousin person say, “you know that you lost that $20 and you could have bought a new doll. Or an ice cream cake. Or a keyboard.” She wanted that.
Yeah. She can still hear it as loud as a dog hears a cheese wrapper.
So when we were walking in the woods the other day and found a $20 bill in the mud? She thought of that day. That day. You can guess what happened. An arrestable offense. Money laundering.
If the best things in life are free, I’m not sure why Girl Person almost fell down in the mud trying to retrieve it as fast as she could.
I can tell you right now. No one else was here. It had been in the mud for awhile. And there was no police officer in sight. Except me.
And I agreed to hold onto it just in case someone lost it. You can’t buy me love. But you can buy me some peanut butter cookies with that.
Now. Here’s the deal. Someone lost that money. And we are sorry for that. But we laundered that money like it had never been laundered before.
She may have thought a million times about why she turned that money in when she was little. She may have thought she shouldn’t have. She may have thought about everything that police officer spent it on. A doll. An ice cream cake. Or a keyboard. Perhaps. But perhaps he found the person who lost it. That’s what I choose to think.
But Girl Person also remembers Gandma telling her to do the right thing. And she did. That’s alright by me.
We can’t count on others to do the right thing. But can we count on ourself? We can be disappointed in ourselves years later. Or we can be happy with the choices we make. $20 may not seem like much. But it can buy peace of mind. And a lot of peanut butter cookies. But not at a rodeo. What was up with that? What will we do with this $20? I don’t know. I don’t know. But I suspect that maybe a horse rescue may need it more than us. You know. That rodeo.
–Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle