Don’t Accuse The Squirelly Squirrel

This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle.  I am always in an arresting mood.  That is not up for discussion.  Or debate, actually.

But even I recognize that some are falsely accused.  Like Squirelly Squirrel.  Yet, they get taken to court every day.

Now.  Every criminal has a mug shot.  And yet, because Squirelly Squirrel did not actually commit a crime, obviously, I do not have a mugshot.  I don’t even have a cupshot.  But what I do have is a story.  A story of how squirrels, even a Squirelly Squirrel can get accused, every day, of something that they aren’t even doing.  And it has to stop.

“You can’t be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet.”

Now.  First things first.  Squirely Squirrel has taken it upon himself to jump like an acrobat from a tree to the bird feeder hanging off of the side of the motorhome every morning to partake of the bird seed buffet.  Now, you know I am all about the details.  So.  Did you know that seeds are not only meant for birds? Ugh, yeah.  Other animals eat seeds, like the squirrel.  I say the bags are false advertising.  That is like putting on a bag, Brickle Peanut Butter Cookies and saying that no one else should eat those cookies.  Which would be perfect for me, but I am a realist, folks.  That is not going to happen.


The persons watch Squirelly Squirrel every morning with the anticipation of Digby watching pancakes sizzle.  Well, actually, not really.  But it is fun to watch him. Also, we do not have TV.  He usually can’t hold on very long, gets dizzy from hanging upside down, and then knocks the seeds out of the container.  No, he isn’t the most elegant of squirrels, but then, who is he trying to impress? It’s not like he is on Dancing With The Stars. I could be though.

So you may wonder.  If Squirelly Squirrel is trying to take the seeds from the birds, why don’t I arrest him.  But I ask you this.  What if the birds are taking the seeds from the squirrels?  Who are we to say? Are you a lawyer?  I didn’t know if you are.

It amazes me how persons can think of one animal as being as a nuisance, like a squirrel.  But then marvel at watching the birds.  But all animals are amazing.

Have you ever watched a squirrel?  I implore you to do so, and as well, buy us some more seed because he is eating it all.  But I will not complain.  It isn’t like he is taking my Brickle Peanut Butter Cookies.  At least not yet.  You see, squirrels like Squirelly Squirrel have life all figured out.  They live life.  They have fun.  They spend their days eating and sleeping and chasing and climbing trees.  And through it all, it never occurs to them that they may be stealing anything like seeds.

“If we had a keen vision of all that is ordinary in human life, it would be like hearing the grass grow or the squirrel’s heart beat, and we should die of that roar which is the other side of silence.” George Eliot

The normalcy of life and those who live it often goes unnoticed by all of us.  And that my friends is the problem.  No arrests will be made today if you thank a squirrel. Thank a squirrel for reminding you that we all deserve the happiness that we find on this earth, and that each of us equally deserve it.

-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle

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3 thoughts on “Don’t Accuse The Squirelly Squirrel

  1. Karen Hampton

    I have HUNDREDS of squirrels in my neighborhood….I let them eat seeds & I also put out nuts & corn for them, too. They are all different sizes & colors & they play games with my doggos. Great entertainment & exercise for all!! Sheriff, you are so wise & handsome…what a combo! And, after all these years…I just noticed your magnificent LOOONNNNGGG toes!!! Beautiful!

  2. Theresa Bates

    I have two huge oak trees off my apartment patio. I put mixed bird seed out for the birds,from a feeder hanging from the patio roof and cast on the ground near the tree trunk. I add raw peanuts still in the shell to the food I put near the tree. The squirrels come down and grab peanuts and run back up the tree to stash them, then return for more. I bet Squirrely Squirrel would be happy to see some on the picnic table, maybe in an aluminum cake pan. I read that they like peanuts above all else.

  3. Patricia Moller

    Good morning Brickle, you have some very good points about squirrels. Years ago my dad had a squirrel who went on his front porch three times a day and wait for Dad to bring him nuts. When I had my house, we had lots of bird and squirrel feeders in our yard. If one of the feeders was empty, I’d have at least 3 squirrels at my back sliders tapping for me to fill it. We also had a chipmunk who took over a bird house with s tiny porch that was on our deck. He would sit on the little porch with his cheeks puffed out full of nuts and sunflower seed. Nature is so much fun to watch. I miss my cardinals and little wrens among other animals who lived in my yard. They were peaceful until Oliver and Samantha went out and chased them away. Nature is very beautiful and entertaining I really miss it being in an apartment. You and Digby bring it back to me every single day. I hope you have a beautiful and fun filled day. Hugs and love. 🐾❤️🐾❤️

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