This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle. You may know that I am a dog of many talents. Looking good is what I do. Looking better is what I do best.
But some little red bird named the Scarlet Pimpernel is trying his best to outdo me and take up all the mirror time around here.
And he hasn’t been doing it for one day. Or three days. Or even a week. Nope. He has been doing this for a week and two days. And we are all about to go crazy.
You see, I named this red bird Scarlet Pimpernel because I am an avid reader of literature, you know.
Actually, I bet you didn’t know that. Because you haven’t read about it, because a book of that caliber has not been written yet. Because I haven’t finished it. Only I could write such a masterpiece. So since my book is not written, I thought very hard about this bird. This little red bird. And it called to mind a literal masterpiece of duels and wits already written. Because that is what is happening here. At camp. Between a bird. A little red bird. A duel of mirror time.
You see, the mirror time around here is valuable. Very valuable. When I want to see myself, I not only have one mirror to choose from, but I must use many, to get different angles. And yet, this little red bird thinks that his handsome is just as important as mine.
Apparently, this Big Blue Treat Wagon RV not only provides him with mirror time to get the ladies, but obviously, he is trying to protect the ladies and the babies he might already have from a bird that he keeps seeing in the mirror. And while this would be entertaining to most, and perhaps most and three more persons, it is not amusing to me. His valiant efforts in protecting his fans while terrorizing the Big Blue Treat Wagon RV mirrors and windows, were enough to make the persons put tape and bags over them all. You see, they started to worry for his mental health while taking ours away.
But alas, the Scarlet Pimpernel still has not given up.
Even yesterday in the rain, his efforts were taken up a notch. It seemed with all of the noise that he was making that he called in all his backups. Little did he know that in fact, this was working. The persons decided that the best thing that we could do for the Scarlet Pimpernel was to move spaces today. And so. We are. And you may think that in fact the Scarlet Pimpernel won this duel.
But the real winner here is me. You see, with us changing campsites, we will leave the Scarlet Pimpernel to his own devices and I get my mirror time back. And ladies? You can now get back in line.
The Scarlet Pimpernel may be crazy. He might be insane at this point. But call me crazy too. Because I will miss the little guy and our daily battle of wits.
I do just have a feeling though that it isn’t over yet.
-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle