50 Ways To Leave Your Lover. Or Not.

This is Deputy Digby Pancake.  Make a new plan, Stan.  We are still stuck in this Florida place.

Who is Stan? I don’t know.  I also do not know why things keep happening to keep us here in our home state.  Yes, it is a place we love and love some more.  But sometimes, you have to leave who you love, and such is the case for our Adventure Of A Lifetime, Florida. So stop it.

Every time we try to leave, this love of ours keeps holding on tighter.  Now, I am all for hugs, but not for stalkers, and this Florida place has crossed the line.  We just need to get on this Big Blue Treat Wagon and head out!  Florida place! Seriously.

You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don’t need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don’t need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free

I have no idea again who Stan is or Jack or Roy or even Gus. I know a Lee but he says he does not have the key to the bus.  And so, yeah.  We ARE going to leave you, Florida place.  Thursday it is, and  you better not do anything else.

What have you done? Let’s see.  The Jeep broke down…getting it back fixed hopefully today.  Then tires on the Jeep because why?  Nails.  The Big Blue Treat Wagon needs tires when we head out on Thursday.  They are finally there.  Sheriff Brickle broke down too with a hurt paw.  I broke down with all those bumps and liver things going wrong.  Girl Person broke her wine glasses.  All of them…and Boy Person?  He tried to fix it all.  If you wanted us to stay, Florida place, you should have just said so.  But instead, you liked to space out your crazy by making us think we were going crazy.

The problem is all inside your head she said to me
The answer is easy if you take it logically
I’d like to help you in your struggle to be free
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover

I guess we love this Florida place just as much as she loves us.  But a little space and time makes the heart grow fonder, ok, Florida?  If you just let us finish our 14 states, we promise we will come back and visit you.

She said it grieves me so to see you in such pain
I wish there was something I could do to make you smile again
I said I appreciate that and would you please explain
About the fifty ways

She said why don’t we both just sleep on it tonight
And I believe in the morning you’ll begin to see the light
And then she kissed me and I realized she probably was right
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover
Fifty ways to leave your lover

So. We appreciate your patience with us as Florida held us captive in her sunshiney arms.  As Girl Person was hiking with us yesterday in the pretty weather and sunshiney, she was enjoying her favorite thing in the world besides dogs and wine.  Oranges.  I don’t particularly care for them, but she cries sometimes when she eats them, remembering our Pappy.  She told us that no matter what, this Florida place would always be home.


There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but your lover may have 50 ways to try and make you stay.  Good try, Florida place.  Good effort.  Now.  We have to get ready to go.  Let us finish up, and before you know it, we will be back.

She said it’s really not my habit to intrude
Furthermore, I hope my meaning won’t be lost or misconstrued
But I’ll repeat myself at the risk of being crude
There must be fifty ways to leave your lover
Fifty ways to leave your lover

Oh, and see ya later Stan, whoever you are.

-Deputy Digby Pancake

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