This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle. And law enforcement must have backup to operate efficiently. Even at all hours of the night, a Sheriff and Deputy must be on constant alert. We must be ready for danger. And we must work as a team.
After being on the road for a few months on this Adventure Of A Lifetime, it became apparent that the persons did not want us to leave their sides. Yes, I know you will think it is the other way around, but law enforcement does not show weakness. So even though we are living in the Big Blue Treat Wagon, which in fact is not very big actually, we want to be with the persons at all times. It is just the way it is.
Usually, Deputy Digby Pancake likes his own space at night. There is not enough room in the person’s bed for all of us, so I sleep in the little space by the bed on my big bed and the Deputy sleeps about ten feet away from us in the kitchen/living room/whatever the only other room is called. However, for the past week, he has decided that we are too far away from him.
I will say that a Sheriff needs his sleep, and the Deputy’s way of dealing with his loneliness is interrupting my beauty refreshment. Now, just like clockwork, at midnight, the Deputy breaks into a howl of all howls. Which in turn makes the persons scream in terror. Which in turn makes me jump up to arrest. And then I realize every time that is just the Deputy trying to divert my attention away from my bed so he can steal it. Who do I arrest first here? If I arrest the Deputy, there is no one to be my backup when I sleep. But actually, I am getting no sleep because he is causing terror anyway. So Deputy Digby Pancake? You. Are. Arrested.
Persons can drink that coffee thing in the morning to wake up. What am I supposed to do after every night like this? Hand me a cup of peanut butter cookies and let’s try that I suppose. The persons take turns going out to sleep with the Deputy every time this happens on a table that folds into a bed. Boy Person says his neck feels like it is folded up too.
Girl Person says that while we are getting everything fixed up to get back on the road, we have got to remedy this midnight scream situation too. Right now we are parked in the woods somewhere, but we are sure once we are at campgrounds again that campers won’t appreciate the interruption.
So for now, until we figure this out, I guess I have to arrest the Deputy for his midnight howl which makes for a midnight scream. Horror movies have nothing on this I tell you.
Have a good weekend everyone. We will be trying to get some sleep.
-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle
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