This is Deputy Digby Pancake. Some things you have to think about. Some things you just do. Some things you think about doing. Some things you do while thinking.
But when your Girl Person is doing something called taxes, and digging for money and receipts and papers, papers, papers, it is only appropriate that I put myself to good use. I mean, if she is digging in taxes, I may have to get her out. Alex? I will take Taxes and Cat Poop for $100, please.
You see, here in this Florida place at Memaw Macaw’s house, there is not much to do except listen to yourself talk if Memaw Macaw is quiet for a moment. But since that only happens when she goes to sleep, it gets pretty boring.
Sheriff Brickle isn’t complaining because he is working on his handsome.
But with not a lot to do, that means I get to contemplate and think a lot of things to do. And I figured that I could actually help with the taxes and digging up stuff. Tommy the cat thought he could help as well, but instead of digging out of taxes, he buried cat poop. All. Over. The. Yard. Obviously, he is not an accountant, but an accountcat. And my thinking of how to keep myself busy while Girl Person digs out of taxes paid off. In cat poop. What kind of deduction should that be listed under?
Girl Person didn’t think that my helpfulness and quick answers to her tax dilemmas were helping. In fact, she kept telling me I had wrong answers. That my calculations were incorrect. And that I need to pick another category. Like Brushing Teeth and Baths For $200, Alex. I don’t know that category, Girl Person.
You see, in my professional opinion, taxes are just one of the craziest things ever. You get paid in papers, you shuffle the papers, you file the papers and you work for more papers. You turn in a paper, mail the paper and then collect more papers. And you never seem to dig yourself out of that hole. It is quite logical to me that instead of burying papers to dig yourself out of at tax time, that cat poop is much better. Yet, Girl Person says that if she mailed that on April 17th, she may get in more trouble. I always say that if you are looking for trouble, you’ve came to the right place. Also, if you are looking for cat poop, you came to the right place as well.
I pretty much think that persons can get caught up in less important things than cat poop. They think that the more papers they have, the more important they are. Although I think that cat poop may not be everyone’s favorite category, I do think that you may need to dig yourself out of something too. I think that if you are a person, it is easy to worry about all the stuff you seem to worry about…like taxes. More poop in the dirt means less to scoop. So bury what you need to to be happy and quit with the papers. If cat poop can appear like magic, imagine what else is out there for you to find other than papers and taxes.
Tommy the cat, the accountcat, concluded that the amount of deductions Girl Person needed were buried indeed. And you know that I will find them. And that my friends is my final answer. But I still don’t know who Alex is.
-Deputy Digby Pancake
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2 thoughts on “I’ll Take Taxes And Cat Poop For $100, Alex”
Be careful with those catculations Girl Person ~ the IRS will have all the pancakes!
I have a brown Labrador that would pay me for cat poop…..lovely as he is, his eating habits are not. I think he needs arresting by the Deputy for crimes against food.