This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle. Welcome to this Texas place, y’all! How many times can I say y’all in the next week? I guess we will find out.
We arrived here yesterday in a place just in time to see the beautiful sunset.
But little did I know, my beautiful tail would be a worry here, y’all.
I was born with this corn dog tail. And I am proud of it, in fact. The amount of times I get questioned about the corn dog tail phenomenon is unable to be counted. For someone to understand that I was simply born with this beauty is too much for some. Am I a special breed they want to know? Am I so exotic that this tail is a one and only? Yes and yes. First off, my special breed is rescue. Secondly, this is a one and only.
Girl Person says that the shelter told her that I had a brother and a sister and that I was the last one born in the litter. Also, the vet person told her that my tail did not fully grow. Well, I tell you what. That was on purpose. I have said it before and I will say it again. I was a man when I was a baby. I know everything, and I knew all this obviously. What I did not know was that in Texas, they lay claim to the first corny dog. Yes, I spelled that right. They call it a “corny” dog. Hey Texas? I know you think that you invented the corny dog. But I invented the corn dog tail. And even though you introduced your treat at the State Pair in the 40’s, I introduced this corn dog tail in 2009. And I don’t need anyone trying to steal it. Stay away from my corn dog tail, Texas.
Do I need a State Fair to debut this corn dog tail to Texas? Absolutely not. If there was ever a time to be discreet, this would be it. I don’t need more adulation for this tail. Someone would definitely try to lay claim on it like some other people did for the corny dog. They say everything is big in Texas. Well, if the pride for my corn dog tail could get any bigger, it would. Different means beautiful, and I have always embraced my tail. The people here are proud of their state like I am my tail. And we can’t wait to find out why. Will it be better than my tail? I can’t promise you that.
This week, our Texas picked rescue is the Humane Society Of Central Texas in Waco. We can’t wait to visit them and see how they are different too. Plus, Girl Person is excited to visit some place here in Waco that fixes up houses. Maybe you know the TV show?
And then, on Sunday, we head out to the hills of Texas. So are you ready? Do you want a corn dog? Stay away from me.
-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle
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