This is Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle. Today has been a good day so far. We got to go hiking again with Girl Person’s best human friend and it was nice. Girl Person’s friend doesn’t go hiking very often, can you imagine that? Her and Girl Person are kind of opposites, like me and Digby, but somehow they make it work. Like me and Digby.
You all know I am a lady’s man, so I thought since this pretty person was hiking with us, I would show her the ropes, how handsome I could be and that hiking was awesome. Plus, shhh…I am gonna tell on Girl Person. She brought a bottle of champagne in her backpack. She told us not to tell, that since we are moving in about a week and a half, she needed to have some fun. You better know I am arresting her.
So since her and the pretty person kept talking, blah, blah and drinking champagne, I thought why not? I am gonna do my freak out. I don’t bring my freak out in the open often, but this totally called for it. I jumped on Digby, he bit my ears and we both freaked out trying to play, trying to drag the persons in the alligator water and having a great time. That was obvious.
The pretty person doesn’t have dogs. Did I mention that? She didn’t know what to do because I guess the cats she has don’t go on hikes, and so she jumped off the trail in horror. Girl Person told her that we were just playing, loudly at that, and to drink more champagne, which I also forgot to mention they were drinking straight out of the bottle. Arrested again.
After hiking, Boy Person came to pick us up and well, I decided that since he was giving Girl Person a lecture on champagne hiking, I would arrest him too and not get in the car. Then I wouldn’t get out of the driver’s seat. This was too much fun freaking out, I haven’t done it in so long. Must do it more often.
You see, the persons are stressing out with moving and packing and our trip and Girl Person needed a break. I needed to freak out. Boy Person? Guess he just needed to lecture someone. 9 a.m is too early for champagne? Boy Person? Don’t freak out, but you. Are. Arrested.
-Sheriff Peanut Butter Brickle