This is Deputy Digby Pancake. Who is afraid of the big bad wolf? Apparently, Boy Person, if he has to go out three times in the middle of the night with me.
You may remember that the persons have been pretty sick the last few weeks. First, they had the flu and then they got sick from the smoke here. I guess me and the Sheriff must have got too close to them, and well, we got sick this weekend too. Especially me.
Sometimes, when you get sick, you drink a lot of water. And sometimes when you drink a lot of water, you have to pee a lot. That sometimes ended up being three times in the middle of the night Friday. But the sometimes were about pee at first, then about a wolf and a few, if not many raccoons.
You may wonder to yourself, what was a wolf doing in a campground in the middle of the night? Well, I didn’t wonder, because a few nights ago, as Girl Person sometimes does, she read us a story about a Big Bad Wolf. So I knew that he was out there. Somewhere. But instead of pigs too, we got a family of raccoons.
As I stood howling at the door…a 3 a.m. dramatic howl, Boy Person ran and got on his clothes and shoes and hurriedly got me outside. All of that water I had drank earlier had really made this an urgent situation. And as we ran down the street to find an acceptable, emergency bush to pee on, I all of a sudden remembered the bedtime story of the Big Bad Wolf. I remembered it was really, really dark outside. I remembered that the Big Bad Wolf may be out there. And then I heard them. Who I thought were the pigs too under our RV was really a family of raccoons. And they were not happy that we were outside.
I saw them just as soon as I started climbing the steps to the Big Blue Treat Wagon RV, and I smelled them, but Boy Person had not noticed them. So, as all good rescue foxhounds must do, I decided that our best bet to remain safe was to go back outside to tell them that not only were they not welcome here, but to warn them that Big Bad Wolf might be there. I just knew they had not read that bedtime story to be informed. I am so up on the news.
So I waited until Boy Person got back into bed and I started howling again. As you can imagine, he was not too thrilled about this, and Girl Person offered to take over. He however took me outside, and I started to drag him as fast as I could under the RV. Now, you may not think that a RV is easy to be dragged under, and no, it is not. But I am all about getting the job done. Boy Person was so mad about it, he took me back inside and forgot to let me pee. Again.
So as he got back into bed this time, against all odds of being let out again, I decided to try. I mean, I had to. So the howling now started up again and a 3:45 a.m. howl is louder than a 3 a.m. howl by a bit. Boy Person asked me if I was seriously kidding. He told me if I was trying to fool him again, it was going to be t-r-o-u-b-l-e. And I don’t know how to spell, but either do raccoons and this was not about spelling. He put on his pants again and asked Girl Person if she thought that the pants wearing was really necessary at this point. He got me outside, I thought that I probably should pee again, so I did and made it extra long. As we were standing there, we heard it.
Howling. Grrrroooowwwllllling. Louder. Growling. More growling. And as Boy Person stood still in his dirty pants which were unnecessary, the dirt, and the pants, I knew it was true, and I was terrified. The Big Bad Wolf was for real. Boy Person told me to remain quiet, and whatever pee I had left now escaped me. We slowly made our way back to the RV, and there they were. A family of raccoons surrounding us. I scrambled up the steps in a fit of raccoon howling and Boy Person laughing. You see, that growling we heard?
Boy Person tried to tell me it was not in fact a mountain lion or a Big Bad Wolf as I had feared. It was some angry raccoons mad that we were ruining their trash party and shoe stealing escapades which they were dragging under the RV.
Well, I figured that was probably enough of peeing and going outside for one night. Boy Person removed his dirty pants, got into bed and I saw him occasionally peaking out the window. Big Bad Wolfs are unpredictable as are raccoons with shoes.
In the morning, Girl Person was tired, but not as tired as Boy Person with no pants, and she decided to take us on a little hike so that Boy Person could rest. She takes us to a hiking place every few days in a place called Salmon Creek. There are little old houses there, and artsy people and such nice furkids. Ever since we got here, she has been looking at a little house and she says that she loves it so much she wants to cry. She seems to do that alot lately.
So as we were walking by it for the millionth time, Girl Person decided that she was going to find out about this little house. But then it dawned on me. This house looked alot like the Grandma’s cottage from Little Red Riding Hood. Was the Big Bad Wolf here and just waiting for us? Who is everyone trying to fool here?
Raccoons. Wolves. Little houses. It was a full weekend. Girl Person told us that we are staying here in Bodega Bay till November 1 as we had planned. This little house with possibly the Big Bad Wolf? This is going to be our last effort to stay in this California place.
Like no other house we have saw, this house speaks to us, despite having a wolf living in it. And some may say we are crazy for trying to find out who has this house that is not for sale. But sometimes, the crazy things persons do result from what is in their hearts. It is no secret we love it here. But if the little house doesnt work out, it is ok. We have decided that a house with a yard, wherever it is, is ok with us. But we are giving it one last try, Sonoma County. Wolf or no wolf.
-Deputy Digby Pancake
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