Coffee, Dog Heads and Fair Game, Not Cauliflower

On By 2 Traveling DogsIn dog blog

Before we begin: This is Fruitycake, and I have some very important business to discuss today. But first, Girl Person would like me to remind you that the full weekday blog, the audio version read by us, behind-the-scenes adventures and exclusive offers are waiting for you on Patreon for just $5 a month. As we continue building our new rescue projects, including This Is…Me and my brand-new weekday podcast, Fruitycake’s Pawcast, your membership helps keep our work going. If you have been thinking about joining, this would be a wonderful week to start. There is a lot happening around here.

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This is Fruitycake. I would like to discuss the importance of leaving your mark on the world. Some persons write books. Some persons build houses. Some persons plant trees that will grow for hundreds of years. I prefer a more immediate approach. I water things. Not everything, of course. I have standards. A rock must possess a certain dignity. A tree must demonstrate potential. A particularly interesting clump of grass must earn my attention. I am not going to waste my valuable resources on an unremarkable leaf when there is a perfectly respectable stump three feet away. This is not a hobby. This is a calling.

Yesterday morning, Girl Person decided that we should enjoy a peaceful moment beside our waterfall here in this Italy place. She brought her coffee, found a lovely place to sit and set her cup down so she could appreciate the beauty of nature. The water was cascading over the rocks, the birds were singing, and the whole mountain seemed to be participating in some sort of inspirational documentary. Girl Person stood there looking thoughtful, which is something persons do when they have coffee and nowhere particularly urgent to be. I gave her a reasonable amount of time to appreciate the scenery. Approximately eleven seconds.

Then I decided to contribute my own waterfall.

There she was, admiring the magnificent work of nature, when I lifted my leg and provided a smaller, more personal interpretation. I believe the artistic term is fruity abstract. She had her waterfall, and I had mine. Hers required thousands of years of geological activity. Mine required a full bladder and excellent balance. Frankly, I thought my performance deserved some recognition, but Girl Person just looked at me over her coffee cup as though I had interrupted a very important meeting between her and a moss-covered rock. Coffee didn’t need my water, it needed creamer but this isn’t Starbucks.

Persons can be terribly possessive about their peaceful moments. They want the birds to sing, the water to flow and the trees to sway, but apparently there are limits to the amount of nature they are willing to appreciate at one time.

Later, we encountered two very small dogs at a picnic area. Now, I have nothing against small dogs. Some of my finest acquaintances are small dogs. But these two appeared to be operating a private security company without the proper licensing. They saw me approaching and immediately began barking as though I had arrived to repossess their picnic table. Their voices were enormous. Their bodies were not. I believe one of them could have fit inside Girl Person’s coffee cup if he had been willing to fold his opinions.

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They barked at me. They barked some more. They informed me, in no uncertain terms, that I was trespassing on territory they had apparently acquired five minutes earlier. I listened politely because I am a professional. I considered their concerns. I evaluated the situation. And then I lifted my leg.

Unfortunately, their heads were in the general vicinity of my official statement.

I would like to clarify that I did not wake up that morning with a plan to pee on anyone’s head. I am an explorer, not a criminal mastermind. But when two tiny security guards position themselves directly beneath the sprinkler system, certain unfortunate events can occur. Their person was horrified. Girl Person was horrified. I suspect the two dogs were horrified once they realized that my response to their strongly worded complaint had been delivered in liquid form.

I continued walking with the quiet dignity of a dog who had just made a very memorable impression. Girl Person apologized, of course, in Italian as well, because persons are forever apologizing for things dogs consider perfectly reasonable. I heard her explaining that I normally have very good manners. I do. I simply have a different definition of fair game. 

Which brings me to cauliflower.

I would like to know who approved this vegetable.

There are many wonderful smells in this world. Fresh grass. Warm bread. Pizza crust. The mysterious contents of Boy Person’s grocery bags. The exact place where another dog stood seventeen hours ago. These are smells worth investigating. But cauliflower smells like a vegetable that has been keeping secrets no one wants to know. And when Girl Person cooks it, the entire rustico becomes involved in its personal problems.

I have considered watering cauliflower as a formal expression of disapproval, but unfortunately it is usually already inside a cooking pot by the time I discover the offense. But I must issue one very serious warning. Nobody had better try making me an imposter pizza out of that thing.  

I have heard rumors about cauliflower pizza crust. I find these rumors deeply disturbing. Pizza is one of the great achievements of civilization. It is not a vegetable rehabilitation program. You cannot take a cauliflower, flatten it, cover it with toppings and expect me to applaud your creativity. That is not pizza. That is identity theft. And I intend to report it to the appropriate authorities, assuming I can find authorities who accept complaints submitted by dogs wearing bells.

Which brings us to today’s affirmation.

October 12 | I Will Protect The Things That Make Me Feel Like Me

I will make room for the interests, rituals and people that reconnect me with myself. Responsibilities matter, but I matter inside my own life too. I will protect one small piece of what makes me feel alive. You are also allowed to have interests beyond solving problems.

I think this is a very important affirmation, especially for persons. You spend so much of your lives fixing things, answering messages, paying bills, worrying about tomorrow, trying to make everyone happy and wondering whether you are doing enough. Sometimes you become so busy taking care of everything that you forget what you actually enjoy. You forget that you are allowed to sit beside a waterfall with a cup of coffee without accomplishing anything. You are allowed to listen to music, cook something simply because it tastes good, read a book, walk somewhere beautiful or spend a ridiculous amount of time watching a dog investigate the same tree from fourteen different angles.

Girl Person has been carrying a lot of responsibilities lately. So has Boy Person. We have a rustico to sell, new rescue projects to build, a podcast to launch and a future that has not yet revealed all of its plans. There are days when it seems as though every conversation is about something that needs to be solved. But yesterday morning, beside that waterfall, Girl Person was not solving anything. She was simply being a person who loves coffee, mountains, waterfalls and the dog who occasionally interrupts all three.

And I was being me.

Dogs understand this rather naturally. I do not stop being Fruitycake because Girl Person has a long list of responsibilities. I still need to sniff things, explore places, investigate suspicious vegetables and make the occasional questionable decision involving a picnic area. I am not suggesting that you should follow my example in every respect. In fact, after yesterday’s incident, Girl Person has specifically requested that I make that very clear.

But I am suggesting that you stop waiting until every problem is solved before you allow yourself to enjoy being alive.

Because there will always be another problem, another responsibility, another barking dog who believes he owns the picnic area. And if you spend your entire life waiting for everything to be perfectly peaceful, you might miss the waterfall right in front of you.

So today, protect something that makes you feel like you. Give it a little time. Give it some attention. You do not need to justify it, turn it into a business or explain why it matters. It matters because you matter inside your own life.

And if someone offers you cauliflower pizza, remember that you are also allowed to have boundaries.

This is Fruitycake. I have made my mark on the world today. Several marks, actually. Girl Person says we will be working on choosing more appropriate locations for them.

I suppose personal growth is important too.

Fruitycake

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P.S. From Girl Person: We received no contributions over the weekend, and we are beginning another week needing support for our daily work, Fruitycake’s Pawcast, shelter outreach and our This Is…Me project. We are hoping to find five sponsors this week at $35 each to help us share the stories of real rescue dogs who deserve to be seen, believed and rescued. Every sponsorship and contribution makes a difference, and we are so grateful to everyone who continues to believe in what we are building.

Here are the ways to help:

One-day calendar sale — Monday only! Our two brand-new 2027 calendars are available today with free shipping. These are our final Italy calendars, and every purchase helps support our projects. Regular pricing and shipping charges begin Tuesday, October 13.

2 Traveling Dogs 2027 Calendar — Portofino, Italy

https://www.paypal.com/ncp/payment/6TLHKT85EC9YL

Under The Crow Rustico 2027 Calendar

https://www.paypal.com/ncp/payment/SNB5CCR7YX5QL

Thank you for helping us continue, for caring about rescue dogs and for being part of this next chapter. We cannot do any of it without you. ❤️