This is Deputy Digby Pancake. And today is going to be a very good day, just like yesterday, and just like the day before. Why? I am getting some work experience together for my resume. I don’t know why I may need a resume, but it seems like a good excuse to do what I do. And I love excuses. I need them to not be arrested by Sheriff Brickle.
Girl Person says that she doesn’t know why I have to mark everything in the world and within every few feet. Ugh, you are not a dog, Girl Person. I don’t question your person antics like why you have to vacuum when in five minutes there is going to be more dog hair. Or why you have to wash dishes when I could just lick them off. So don’t question my work experience either.
Sheriff Brickle says that it is good to always be prepared to make money to buy our dog treats and pancakes and cookies in case the persons get lazy. I started thinking about what I could add to my resume and I thought that since we are traveling to all the 48 states, I should roll in as much stinky stuff as I can. I don’t always know what the stinky stuff is, but I will leave that out of the resume. I hope however that my future employer is not reading this. In that case, well, I will be researching what the stinky stuff is by rolling in it again.
My current employer, Sheriff Brickle said that he would start working on this resume too and started yesterday by eating unknown poop which he will be researching shortly. Girl Person was mortified as she can’t tell what any of this stinky stuff is. If you ask me, she needs to work on her resume apparently.
As Deputy, it is my job to inform you that your resume should also be updated. Did you roll in enough stuff today? If not, I would get to work on that, but not too hard because I don’t want you competing for any job I might apply for.
That being said, time to get to work.
-Deputy Digby Pancake
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