The Last Bite Again

This is Peanut Butter Brickle. Oh, to be me. Some days others irritate me so much. Some days, others make me laugh. Some days, I feel like I want to be nice. Some days I feel like I want to be less than nice. Do you ever feel like that?

Life has a way of making us forget all of the wonderful things out there and wonderful individuals out there. Yes. They are out there. But the stress of life can be overwhelming. I’ve felt very stressed since Digby passed away. We were together all of the time for many, many years. And I miss him. And I’m sad sometimes. The sad turns into mad. And I don’t really know why. I can’t explain it.

So when Fruitycake came to live with us last weekend, I had mixed feelings about that too.

I didn’t want to forget about Digby. Even though sometimes the pain I want to forget. And it is those little moments that get me the most. Like at dinner time when I’ve had no one to leave the last bite for.

Until yesterday. I realized when I looked over at Fruitycake that I did have someone to leave a last bite for again. And without thinking, I did leave that last bite. And it felt ok to do that.

Have you ever loved someone so much that you would give up anything for them? Maybe you did. And now you’re alone. But you can love again. You can feel again. And you may have given up all you had for them. You can do it again for someone else. It’s one of the purest joys that is. To give of ourselves unselfishly is never to be regretted. Even if we lose that someone.

Digby gave all he had to live. He didn’t have to try all of these last years.

But he did. And I know he didn’t regret it. He literally gave all he had. So I can do it again too. Fruitycake, I left my last bite of dinner again. For you. In honor of Digby. To show that my heart may not be healed. But your heart needs healing too. Let’s help each other.

Peanut Butter Brickle

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Their mission is to provide a year round program that helps Inner City Youth with mentorships in school and access to outdoor activities to keep them out of trouble, off the streets and to see them advance in life.

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